Like Sands In An Hourglass
It feels a bit weird airing the old dirty laundry here but fuck it. The last few days have been bizarre and full of firsts or renewals I should say. We have my drug snorting compadres who have yet to be confronted or told what I am going to do or not do. Then there is the old familia. This family could have me blogging till I'm old and gray (wait I got some grays now). I can't tell you how
many times the cops have been over the house back in the day. I can't tell how many times somebody had to go to the hospital or needed some serious medical attention after a brawl. I can't tell you how many times a get together of some sorts, BBQ's, christenings, birthday parties, a family reunion, or hell even just evening dinner would end up in a "dispute". You could get stabbed at the dinner in my house growing up. Its happened. When you came to dinner at my house you best be packing. It was more like you went to fight and a family reunion broke out. I don't know why it turned out this way but it has. My main concern for me is that this sick demented way of life and cycle of dysfunctionality not be passed on to my own family. So far so good.
So I spoke to my "moms" last night and set up a breakfast for Friday morning at 9:00 a.m. in a public place, a local diner. I will not be packing however I will take my usual seat in the diner whereby I will keep them in front of me. For the first time in probably 20 years I will be sitting down to a meal with my mother and father together, civilized I hope. I'm sure it will be awkward at first since my father and I haven't spoken to each other in quite some time. To me he is still the biggest prick walking the planet earth but he is my dad and I still love him. My mom has her own set of issues. I am not really sure where it will all go but I will just play it by ear. I am not really nervous or anything like that I am just concerned that if I sit down with them that I may have wasted my time. Anyone close to me knows that what I hate more than anything in this world is having my time wasted. I have been telling my parents for 20 years how this was all going to turn out. Everything that I said would happen has happened. I have heard, "how the hell do you know what's going to happen, you don't know that, what are you a mind reader, who the hell do you think you are, God?" I have heard all of those and more over the years and now it has all come full circle for my parents. I guess its taken a while to sink in and for them to say, no mas or no more. I will keep you posted.
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